instruments are my only friends

just kidding, but close. all my friends are obnoxious boys who get in trouble too much.

we got our list of electives back for ninth grade. i, of course, put drama as my first choice, then band, an then maybe art or something idk. i just want to get into drama.

i really don't have much to say i just wanted to post on here because i haven't in so long.

i want to learn a ton of songs for piano but i don't have a printer so i don't have any sheet music :( everything is sad. just kidding, just me, because i'm confused.

i miss things being the way they were. nothing changed at tantasqua. there wasn't much drama. here, it seems like everything is so unexpected. i was sam's best friend and he was mine and ben was my fourth best friend and i told them everything and math was hard and luke was a cutie pie and i didn't do my homework and i didn't get into much trouble and the floors had icky purple carpet and i sat next to kevin and i didn't know anyone's secrets and i was everyone's friend.

but secrets come out at two in the morning.

secrets come out when you're not somebody who's going to school there.

secrets come out when i don't count.

i hate secrets.

i miss math help sessions and crying over work and fearing for class recommendations and wishing for the end of the day to come sooner and things like that. i miss music class. i miss the people i once knew.

but i can't have it back, and i know that. i don't really want it back. i just wish my final memories weren't spilled secrets spoken at two in the morning, over a can of arnold palmer and a bag of kevin's crushed doritos, under a blanket on a library floor (that sounds much weirder and sketchier than it was, trust me).

i just want music.