Gonna fool the bad

my hair actually looked like exactly like this until the dye washed out at the ocean.

hm. what are you gonna do?

sleepover tonight with krista, felecia, and lily. tacos and ice cream and movies are involved. right now i'm listening to music. and i'm blogging. and i wish i was swimming. so anyways, i gave myself a haircut yesterday and i personally love it.

the only bad thing about summer is that i can't wear my beanie hat. which i miss. i always joke around with my cousins because they say i wear it so much, i say if i could i would marry my beanie hat. i love my beanie hat.

well, short post today, but i felt like posting something. back to music :3

Tonight we're going hard, just like the world is ours, we're really superstars, we are who we are.-We R Who We R by Kesha

it's a hole in the wall.

summer.

well, this summer is shaping out a lot better than i'd been expecting. it's been mostly hanging out with sam, swimming, drinking soda, flip flops, not doing my makeup because i'm not going out, and blond hair. (yeah, dats me.) listening to music off my laptop, texting brian and sam and anita and kyle and not really anyone else. this kid i barely know somehow got my number and has been talking to me quite a bit lately, and it's kind of annoying.

i love car rides. the wind through my hair, just the feeling of motion. i've just always really liked riding in cars. i listen to my ipod.

the other day, sunday, i'm pretty sure, i was riding with my dad, sam, and corrina. we were taking him home after youth group (yeah, definately sunday then) and it was just nice. we just chilled out in the backseat, listening to my dad....talk...about smores. and how they're not fruit. i had to fish his stuff out of my purse. he keeps his phone, insulin, needle tips, and OH AND HIS SOCKS pretty much anything else in there.

this summer is great. i've been on vacation with josh and andrew, been shopping with them too. that was so cool. it was just us, josh being our "bodyguard," because he's sixteen and andrew and corrina aren't really supposed to go alone so the "big kids" tagged along. that was really cool. we stopped for candy at night. it was dark, we poked around stores, and it was tons of fun. then we met back up with his mom.

i've been to the ocean with felecia, kaylyn, morgan, krista, corrina, and mackenzie. i haven't hung out with kyle or anita yet, and that's rather annoying, but hey. we've still got a month.

:)

Tryin to call home

tonight me and sam went swimming for a while, went to mcdonalds, and then watched a movie at youth group. we ate popcorn and melty candy and shared and almost fell asleep a couple of times, he talked through it, i tried not to cry. then we drove home to the sweet soundtrack of my dad talking about golf courses and big wheels and ice cream and how he never takes me anywhere.

i love sam. i really do. not in a mushy gooshy ew kind of way. in a brother-sister love, a bit like twins except we're not related. we were twins for twin day at school. but we're extremely close. he's been to family events. he's been there every time something happens and now we're both leaving each other because he's transferring schools.

it's kind of sad, really. but we'll still talk and call and he still promised he'd teach me how to skateboard. a while ago. and he keeps stuff in my purse and i kept things in his hair and we'd copy each others homework. and tonight, he's wearing a pair of my shorts (like i haven't worn his sweaters enough) and i like to think that our frienship has always been comfy-cozy and bubblegum flavored, just like tonight, laughing and freaking out the girl at mcdonalds. i like to think we've got our own playlist. tell me a lie by one direction, fifteen by taylor swift, and telephone by lady gaga are pretty much our songs, but payphone's the top.

"If happy ever after did exist, I would still be holding you like this. All those fairy tales are full of it. One more stupid love song, I'll be sick. You can't expect me to be fine, I don't expect you to care. I know I've said it before, but all of our bridges burned down."-Payphone by Maroon 5, clean version

Jacob.

 acting is a funny world. i never suspected to make so many friends, make so many connections, get jobs and roles i've never heard of. it's funny. everybody out in the audience sees what they think is our perfect play. because we hit the notes, dance in sync, we're utterly amazing to anybody out there. but we know what we do wrong. we see our mistakes. we kill each other for mistakes.

but with all that aside, allow me to mention Jacob.

i'd never known jacob until "the show at the high school." i'd walked late into music class, sat down, and my teach came up to me and started talking. he said he'd seen me perform and wanted to know if i'd be interested in taking a part in the high school play. he said he'd been in need of a walk in and he'd gotten the other two he needed, a girl named summer i'd known from last winter and a boy named jacob who also went to my school. he said it'd be a big deal and i'd need to go to rehearsals and do the three shows. i agreed.

i caught the late bus over from a detention over to the high school, where i wandered around until i found the rest of the cast, a couple of highschoolers i didn't know, now who i call some close friends. and i met jacob, a minor legend at our school. he was "the other actor." i'd heard about him. from the looks he gave me, he'd heard about me.

well, the play was terrible. our two leads missed cues and lines, one of their pants dropped, and we were so incredibly loud backstage. but i got to know jacob. he was tall, like me, funny, and he always dressed rather nicely, which i thought. we got called out of school the next day to do the shows at the highschool in the middle of the day. it was so cool. i missed morning classes. so did he. we goofed off and talked and i realized there were more people in the acting business than the ones i knew. we made mistakes, we'd only been to one rehearsal each. but it wasn't painful, it was fun.

i made friends in that show that i still talk to now. jack, kevin, erin, doug, summer...and jacob. since that day, we passed in the halls and smiled, high-fived, made brief contact. and everybody acknowledged it as naturaly. after all, we were the actors in the school, we had to stand by.

this picture does not remind me of jacob. it reminds me of me and my other friend jacob, who's also an actor, but the more serious kind. i was in school house rock with him. we were better. that show was better. and i loved both shows. but i wonder who i'll meet. you've always got to keep an eye out for people like you, even if you don't know it yet.

i miss you dancing

i know some of you don't like the pictures-and-lyrics posts, but i feel like there's a need for one today. i'm sorry. i've got five thousands songs in my head and just as many pictures floating around on my laptop so...enjoy.

 We still have memories, all those days and summer nights.-Missing You by Letters & Lights

 Slept in all my clothes like I didn't care. Hopped in to a cab, take me anywhere. I'm in if you're down to get down tonight.-Good Time by Owl City

 But you'll find blessings in the clouds, you'll find mercy in the rain. And you'll have heartache down the road, and tears shed from a broken soul.-Life is Beautiful by The Icarus Account

 Twenty-one finds me, blowing out candles and making wishes and all around me my barefoot princess dances and sings.-Just Another Birthday by Casting Crowns

 Close your eyes, and I'll kiss you, tomorrow I'll miss you, remember I'll always be true. And then while I'm away, I'll write home everyday. And I'll send all my loving to you. All my loving, I will send to you. All my loving, darling I'll be true.-All My Loving by The Beatles

I threw a wish in a well, don't ask me I'll never tell, I looked to you as it fell and now you're in my way. I trade my soul for a wish, pennies and dimes for a kiss, I wasn't looking for this but now you're in my way.-Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jeffreson

do you ever feel already buried deep?

well, it's the fourth of july, kids :)

dad's having a tiki barbeque with the family, sam's coming over to swim, with sparklers and i am planning to have a wonderful day. this really is no special day, other than the day my freedom was declared ;) thank you, God, for giving me a free country. im happy today.

aunt terry, who'll probably read this, can't wait to see you and gram today <3 love yall
happy fourth :3

They don't like him

I love just ranting on a blog that nobody but my aunt Terry reads.
It's fun to ramble.

a painted love song

Day after day, alone on a hill, the man with the foolish grin is keeping perfectly still.
But nobody wants to know him, they can see that he's just a fool.
And he never gives an answer.
But the fool on the hill sees the sun going down, and the eyes in his head see the world spinning round.
Well on the way, head in a cloud,
the man of a thousand voices talking perfectly loud. But nobody seems to hear him, or the sound he appears to make,
And he never seems to notice.
But the fool on the hill sees the sun going down, and the eyes in his head see the world spinning round.
And nobody seems to like him, they can tell what he wants to do.
And he never shows his feelings,
But the fool on the hill sees the sun going down, and the eyes in his head see the world spinning round.
Oh, round and round and round and round and round and round.
He never listens to them,
He can knows that they're the fools.
They don't like him,
The fool on the hill sees the sun going down, and the eyes in his head see the world spinning round.

-The Fool on the Hill by the Beatles